RICK TOONE

February 22, 1965 — June 15, 2008

Monster — "Spirit of George"

"As a kid, I was warned to not go over my best friend's house
because his older brother George was "bad news".
He drank and got high and drove around in a wrecked pickup
with a 2 x 4 for a bumper and a bed full of beer bottles.

I thought that he was cool and dangerous.
He had a shoebox that never once had shoes in it.
And I'd hear him while I was outside playing ball,
playing 'Spirit of the Radio' full blast on an old purple Telecaster.

When he wasn't around, we'd go in his room.
Turn out all the lights except the red one.
Put on the stereo and play that old Tele really terribly
Pretending we were cool and talented like him.

We all got older and George didn't change.
Walking around town on stilts, higher than hell.
We got jobs, got married, had kids, got mortgages.
And waited for him to join us.

I got the call yesterday that he was gone.
Others hurt him but he hurt himself worse that they ever could.
I don't know if I'll go to the funeral.
And I don't feel like having a drink to his memory...he had enough already.

But I think I know what I am going to do.
Tonight when nobody is around.
I'm going to go home, turn out all the lights.
And play 'Spirit of the Radio' full blast until George smiles."

Dale Storer

"Sometimes it's hard saving people. Especially when sometimes it involves saving them from themselves.

That stubborn SOB - my brother, told me when we were putting up drywall in my mother in law's bedroom suite that 'He had cheated death so many times, that it was time to pay up."

Of course trying to be optimistic, I said, "What kind of lame bullshit thinking is that?" And I went on about life and how it's something worth living, etc.

I have witnessed it before - ones you love and care about slowly fading away, due to illness or their own vices - too busy with tending to our own lives and families to give more than we can. I was front row center when me and my wife's family lost their Father to Lung Cancer. Yes I grieved, but it didn't quite hit home - not like last Sunday. Fortunately for the Storer family, we have not lost anyone - until now. The 'Son' count is down by one this week. Now, I can't speak for my family, but I am really having a time trying to get over the loss. George has been slowly killing himself over the last 3 years and you harden yourself up and brace for what is inevitable, but it still rocks me to the core.

We had good days and bad, glimpses of 'The old' George. When he had it in the bag and was working steadily forward, and his days when he lapsed cause life was dealing too many hurdles for him to jump. There were many times where we would laugh about the stupid things we did when we were younger and the thought of what we are here to do today never crossed our minds. Well unfortunately, I can only laugh or chuckle to myself from here on out. We will not get to know how George's voice will sound when he gets older - Gravelly? Froggy? - I haven’t a clue.

When is it that you actually realize that this moment or that moment is the last time you would ever speak again in this world? My brother had a hard life, some of it was brought on by his mannerisms, but I can only wish that life dealt him more breaks.

About a month ago, my brother was jumped by 3 guys between the Car Wash and KFC in town on a rainy night while he was on the way home from picking up Chinese food and his fix. When he hit the ground, they kept kicking him in the stomach and back. They took no money, did not demand his dinner or bottle - they just beat him. George once said that when you're down, there is always someone there to kick you in the teeth. He was hopelessly fighting depression and it was always a marvel to me how he kept moving on when he had those moments like I just mentioned. There is no other person I know of that could endure what he has. He crawled home in the rain for -I guess- about 3/4 mile back home. He didn't report it or go to the hospital, but that was George - he took it and, well...

In retrospect we think that it was then where he started the way down the hill, but he would never let any of us in on it. In his weakened state, as we now know, it was a matter of time.

I did get to speak to him one morning after that and he turned me onto a new song he wrote - he always had a new song or progression to share - and now they are forever lost. I was thankful that our conversation was upbeat and I was able to control myself from saying something stupid.

He went into the hospital after he collapsed and Mom & Dad could not help him up. He was in for a little over a week and I did not go to see him. I was so 'matter of factly' thinking that he would get back on his feet and give it another try like he's done before, and we'd get the old George back for another round. We were sure that he would beat this sooner or later. He was resilient for how much abuse he received from life and himself.

We all tried to get him to see things from another perspective than his depressed state, to see that there was another way of doing things, a game that has to be played to get ahead - or just to get back to where he was 3 years ago. He always did things HIS way, I guess he didn't care much about right, wrong, the consequences or other ways of doing things - that stubborn SOB. It is truly a shame that (in my opinion) he never got that thing that the rest of us take for granted. A reason. A reason to keep on - sure we have our significant others and kids that we rip our hair out over from time to time, but I would not trade that for the whole world - they ARE my reason. He did give it his all and tried many times to get his life in line, but for one reason or another, things just didn't work out. Again, I wish life could have dealt him some more breaks.

And now I have to think about the job that has just begun. To fill a void that was not there before - can it be filled? I think how ironic life really is when your brother dies this day, and you still have to make it back home to shock the pool so the kids can swim safely since you found a dead chipmunk floating in the pool earlier. The point being is that we still must move forward, our lives do no not end.

If I can say something upbeat, it would be that his example, however sad and downtrodden, makes me to cherish my wife, children and family that much more. And to reflect upon the times - shared times - time itself, something we now understand is a precious item not to squander and waste with petty problems, and bickering from the abrasion of everyday life. If only just for the next few weeks to remember this, to move forward - and I'm not talking about walking down the street, I'm talking about how to keep going on, try remember the past and to think and do the better things for all of us and our peers and strangers we meet.

So, we now have the hardest task to do - by filling the void left, but what shall we use to fill it? We should use what has been used in the past, memories, good and bad. Ones that make us laugh together, ones that make us wonder how we are still in one piece - there are a few of those when I think about George. It's pretty much all we have left now.

I think of his quote from earlier, “I have cheated death so many times...” I can recall a few, when he fell 20 feet from the top of Chris Casey's tree while carving his initials in a limb. While on his bike he was run over by some guy in a speeding car on the back road in Chesterfield, after George was sneaking away from Amy Herbert's house in the AM and having to go the 'back way' so her Dad didn't know he was there. He yanked his bike from under the front of the car while the guy was apologizing and asking him if he was alright - he was so pissed about the damage to his bike, he didn’t say anything more than, “Look what you did to my bike!”. And then he shouldered it and walked home. Then there was the time he was shot by his scoutmaster while on a weekend retreat for the Boy Scouts. The scoutmaster had 2 guns and didn’t call ‘Clear before firing the .38 pistol. My brother and a friend were out behind the target digging out slugs since that was the way to impress the other scouts by how much lead you had. The shot ricocheted off of a tree before hitting him in the hamstring and the calf and finally resting in the mound. He told me that what was scarier was the crowd of scouts running at him at full sprint with ‘Merit badges gleaming in their eyes’ and pulling out their pocket knives. It took 3 of the sitting on him to hold him still so they could ‘field dress’ his wounds. Then there was the time when he pegged Steve Miller in the face with a snowball meant for Ted Summerfield - Pete Clayton said, “He never saw Steve run so fast.”

He was always joking around, I used to get so mad when he would call with the ‘Bad joke of the Day’ (that meant he was drinking again), but I must admit - I would love another call. He always was in the spotlight that he made. In high school they were playing volleyball outside and the ball got bumped so high it went onto the roof. He got sent to the office after he shimmied up the gymnasium downspout, threw the ball down and did a little dance up there before climbing back down.

An accomplished songwriter and Rock fan. From the 14th row at Kansas to the nosebleeds for Van Halen on the Diver Down tour to Dokken, Judas Priest, Heart, ZZ-Top - man - we'd be here for half the night. I imagine the din from his screaming and whistling are still reverberating somewhere around the top of the Spectrum.

We think of the positive things he has accomplished. Like when he made his first solo flight in my brother Ralph's Cessna. To when he would ride his bike all the way to Ralph's house in Presidential Lakes to help him work on his truck. He helped my brother Ed build his house over 5 years. Sure, Ed subcontracted some of the work out, but it was he and George that built that house. The blood and sweat of five years is there. If you ever needed someone to help, George would give of himself and not care about payment (most of the time), it was how he lived and gave of himself so selflessly, that is what to remember

I've taken too much of your time already, so let's wrap this up. I gave you the circumstances of his life and a good start for the ‘memory machine’ to start up.

Let’s remember my brother for the good man that he is, and the many things he has done to make us laugh, that is what he wants."